Having grandparents at home is a blessing

Guest Commentary
By Asfia Yassir
New Canadian Media

Grandparents can be gems to have as part of any family unit. Regardless of their day-to-day contributions, their mere presence can have a positive effect on all those around them.

Within a family household, this could range from eliminating loneliness, creating bonds or conveying culture through generations. But for many immigrants, in a practical sense, grandparents play a unique role in offsetting the financial burden of childcare.

For Ritu Ganesh, the cost of daycare was more than what they could afford. The fact that her 18-month-old daughter would not eat or even talk to anyone because of how unhappy she was at the daycare, only added to her distress.

“Having my mother over for a visit and later my mother-in-law who moved with us in Canada was like stirring happiness in the family. I did not have to pay for the daycare anymore which would take more than half of what our monthly mortgage was,” Ganesh recalls.

The family had been in the midst of a financial crunch following their decision to buy a house so work had become imperative. When Ganesh’s mother arrived in Canada, however, she was able to look after her daughter.

The number of grandparents across the country is growing at a significantly faster rate than the general population. With the aging population of Canada, grandparents are playing a critical role in their family’s lives as a caregiver, mentors, and spiritual guides.

Many immigrants are bound by their culture to take the financial responsibilities of their parents despite living in separate countries. When such parents move in with their sons or daughters, it can also help cut expenses related to monthly remittances.

Living with a child’s family is a preferred choice for many elderly parents as they don’t have to go through the empty nest syndrome.

However, it requires a lot of effort and courage for grandparents to settle down in a new place. In addition, they must overcome the nostalgia they experience while living in Canada.

“Life is quite happening back home. I miss all the cultural festivities and the fun we used to have with my relatives,” mentions Sumitha Ganesh who is living here with her son’s family. It is because of this nostalgia that Ganesh travels back home every year to reunite with all that she yearns for.

For immigrants still attempting to adapt to their new “Canadian lives”, the multi-generational family system becomes a means of solace. More than 1 in 5 recent immigrants (21%) lived with their grandchildren in 2011, compared with three percent of the Canadian-born population in the same age group.

In single-parent households, the demand put on the sole income earner can become overwhelming at times. The trials of migrating to a new country are magnified compared to when both parents are present.

For immigrants, in particular, it is crucial to have the moral and emotional support of family as they begin their lives in a new country.

However, having an elderly parent in the home can also be stressful for younger generations. Old age comes with its own impediments in terms of health, requiring continuing care and emotional support.

The reality of multi-generational households is more complex compared to conventional family units. However, for many immigrants, the benefits of having these family members around far outweigh the negatives.

Parenthood is a journey of countless sacrifices as well as phenomenal devotion. Yet despite these untiring efforts, it seems that even in their old age, these parents may still have more to offer. In their support of the next generation, they become a source of relief for the entire family.

While their children care for them an endless life cycle is continued in their new Canadian homes.

 This piece originally appeared in New Canadian Media.
See  http://mailgate.newcanadianmedia.ca/component/k2/43094-grandparents-at-home-a-blessing